The Most Epic Battle EVER: SFF Characters Atop the Empire State Building

[Ian P. Johnson]

Okay, I mentioned this in a comment on a blog post today (original post here) and it gave me an incredible idea. Here's my original comment:

Ned Stark and King Arthur battling atop the Empire State Building… YES. I would pay money to see that. Like, actual money made out of money.

Of course, that got me to thinking… What SFF characters would you like to see battling it out atop the Empire State Building, and would pay physical money to see fighting there? Because let's face it, any battle atop the Empire State is traditionally a movie-climax scene. Feel free to let your imaginations go crazy. We are unlimited by budget here, since ideas are cheap. The only rule: you have to actually want to pay actual money (made out of money) to see them fighting up there.

Here's my personal favorite ideas:

1. Doctor Manhattan, the blue god-like superbeing from Watchmen, vs. Xykon, the epic-level lich-sorcerer in Rich Burlew's webcomic Order of the Stick. This seems like it would be an incredible battle, one that would break the special-effects budget for all time to come. Both are near-omnipotent superbeings, and plus, Xykon has quite a witty, debonair sense of humor. So you'd get some great one-liners.

2. A Link-Zelda tag team against Ganondorf, Prince of Darkness. This would be great because not only are the Zelda games my favorite game series, but the Empire State Building seems like it would make an excellent stage in Super Smash Brothers, which would be incredibly fun to watch. Which brings me to my next one…

3. The entire cast of Super Smash Brothers: Brawl. Because there's no kill like overkill. Oh, and this one isn't a team battle. It's a battle royale. All items are turned on, including final smashes.

4. The crew of Serenity versus the Millenium Falcon. This would be excellent. Both teams get their ships, but they are restricted to a region between 20th and 42nd streets (the area around the Empire State Building). And Serenity gets an upgrade of a laser cannon, because everyone knows there ain't guns on a transport ship. Otherwise the battle would be unfair.

5. Gandalf vs. the Balrog. 'Nuff said.

I turn the conversation over to you. What would you pay money to see?

[JLaSala]

Gandalf vs. Balrog. For one, we already know what this looks might look like, but the dynamics of skyscraper battle are quite different; the collateral damage would be great. Gandalf would be concerned about that.

I'd hate to see Serenity go up against the Falcon. They're both good guys.

[jaredgarrett]

First off, you can't take the sky from me.

As for who to battle up there on the Empire State Building? Harry Dresden and any bearer of the Crystal Shard. Or perhaps Vin and Saruman.

[Ian P. Johnson]

I'd hate to see Serenity go up against the Falcon. They're both good guys.

True. So let's make this a fight with Serenity and the Millenium Falcon fighting to defend New York City against a fleet of Reavers who have been given TIE Fighters by the Imperial government and let loose to conquer the earth. Of course, this isn't a likely alliance. But you know what? That's what makes it so awesome.

Oh, and I don't think I made this clear. You guys don't choose which one of the ideas I put up is best. You make up your own ideas.

[trench]

Ender Wiggin Vs Harry Potter

[jmeltzer]

you think Kong is going to let anyone else up there?

[tnh]

Harry Dresden vs. the time-travelling crew of the Enterprise. If you're going to stage fights on top of major buildings in NYC, I want the combatants to be subject to as many rules as possible that forbid them to hurt bystanders, destroy civic infrastructure, or otherwise smash up the place. For me, super-powered fights involving New York skyscrapers just aren't as much fun as they were a decade ago.